1000 Days Sober Podcast

Failure Doesn't Exist When Becoming Someone That Doesn't Drink Alcohol

“Failure is a lack of success, or the omission of expected or required action.” So is ‘failure’ present when becoming someone that doesn’t drink alcohol? Yes and no. A quote from Brené Brown. “If you choose courage, you will absolutely know failure, disappointment, setback, even heartbreak. That’s why we call it courage. That’s why it’s so rare.” “If we are brave enough often enough, we will fall. Daring is not saying “I’m willing to risk failure.” Daring is saying “I know I will eventually fail, and I’m still all in.” I’ve never met a brave person who hasn’t known disappointment, failure, even heartbreak.” To understand failure as it applies to our work, we have to define success. For me, success is not whether we drink alcohol or not. The Truth About Alcohol (TTAA) philosophy is so vast that it swallows ‘alcohol’ as a galaxy does to planet earth. TTAA philosophy helps you to become the best version of yourself, and there is no failure during this voyage into the apocalypse of your mind, only opportunities to learn. Where we do encounter failure is the ‘omission of expected or required action.’ We only improve when we do the work. You are here to do the work, and you know when you are skipping school. Hopefully, in today’s podcast, I can help you better understand the consequences. The Truth About Alcohol We Are Not Alcoholics, And we Refuse to be Anonymous Join Us & Our Community TTAA Taster: http://www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/p/TTAA%20Taster TTAA Intensive: https://www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/p/TTAAIntensive Strive Community: https://strive.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/

Scott Stabile on Love, Empathy and Forgiveness

Scott Stabile is a writer, speaker, and workshop wizard. His inspirational posts and videos have attracted a huge and devoted social media following. He is the author of Big Love: The Power of Living with a Wide-Open Heart, Just Love, and Iris. A passionate speaker and love advocate, Scott runs daylong empowerment workshops nationally and internationally. In today’s podcast, Scott shares how he processed the murder of his parents including forgiving the person who pulled the trigger, his theories on big love and how empathy lies at the heart of his work, and much, much more. The Truth About Alcohol We Are Not Alcoholics, And we Refuse to be Anonymous Join Us & Our Community TTAA Taster: http://www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/p/TTAA%20Taster TTAA Intensive: https://www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/p/TTAAIntensive Strive Community: https://strive.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/

Processing Life 'Before' And 'After' Alcohol

The buzzing as the fly desperately tries to escape the maze of my mother-in-law’s house sounds like a man leaning on a jackhammer in downtown LA. Of course, I’ve heard the sound thousands of times, only today, as someone that doesn’t drink alcohol, I listen to it, I find empathy with it, and I pose the question, “ Why does it make me want to stand in the middle of a busy Fairway?” In ‘Nature’, Ralph Waldo Emerson’s first treatise, he says: “Good thoughts are no better than good dreams unless they are executed!” But the thought does come first, and when I was drinking, my thoughts did need executing, but not in the form of affirmative action, but at the end of a rope. “Thoughts! You are to be hanged until you are dead, dead, dead!” Today, I am switched on. I am like a locomotive, when before I was a man eaten alive by irrational motive. I am a set of Bose cans screwed into a Bang & Olufsen sound system, when before I was those foam things plugged into a Sony Walkman, spouting nonsense that belonged in a toilet cistern. Back then it was about me. Today, it’s about you. And you. You. You. And You. Back to my old buddy Ralph, and he was on to something. Thoughts turn into feelings that turn into actions - and for that sequence to knit together like DNA you need awarenesses of self and the surrounding world, acceptance of your ailments, and the bravery and courage to commit to change. And you get that by making a choice. One choice. To stop drinking alcohol. Look, man, I know that it feels strange; that you think all of your friends will think you’re deranged, and you are the white outline hanging at the end of the shooting range. But it's time you changed. What changes when you become someone that doesn’t drink alcohol? Everything. Everything man. Striver Glynis asks, “I read somewhere that a good question to ask yourself is: “what does my life look like before alcohol, and what does my life look like after alcohol?” I can’t get my head around the question… What do you make of it? Is it simply an answer like “Before I have my first drink I am feeling ‘xyz’… and after I drink a bottle of wine I say hurtful things, and my head hurts,” or do you think it goes deeper? The whole picture of life with or without alcohol? I really like the question and am pondering over the answer in relation to my ‘whole life’ before and after… And that’s what we talk about in today’s podcast. The Truth About Alcohol We Are Not Alcoholics, And we Refuse to be Anonymous Join Us & Our Community TTAA Taster: http://www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/p/TTAA%20Taster TTAA Intensive: https://www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/p/TTAAIntensive Strive Community: https://strive.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/

Will Concentration and Energy Levels Increase When I Become Someone That Doesn’t Drink Alcohol

The fridge light turns me on. A carton of milk with a familiar face greets me. “Have You Seen This Man. Missing for 35-years.” Bloodshot eyes; buckshot thighs; a champagne flute filled with lies. It's me. It's me. That I despise. The zombification of human nature had me by the balls. I walked right into it, led by trusted mentors, acne on my shoulders the size of Indiana Jones’ boulders. I drank because that’s what people like us do around here. Cider. Lager. Red wine. And. Beer. You don’t shift gears because you don’t know you have any. You don’t take the parking brake off because you don’t know it’s on. You don’t think because you don’t know how. You don’t ask questions, not even the one about eating that beautiful looking cow. Not now. Not ever. Stop trying to be so clever. But when you wake the fuck up and take the vow, there is no stopping you now. Courage and bravery, medals pinned, the cans, and the bottles - everything, binned. There is a helicopter swirling, and you are the wind. You can go anywhere, do anything, no longer chained to the sinned. The transformation is for all to see, and it’s incredible how you missed it for so long, you and me. The rush of air on the nape of your neck. The smell of a rose. No more nervous wreck. Striver Neil asks if his concentration and energy levels will increase when he consigns alcohol to the past, and that’s what we cover in today’s podcast. The Truth About Alcohol We Are Not Alcoholics, And we Refuse to be Anonymous Join Us & Our Community TTAA Taster: http://www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/p/TTAA%20Taster TTAA Intensive: https://www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/p/TTAAIntensive Strive Community: https://strive.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/

Lessons From World Class Poker Players We Can Adopt During the 6 Stages of TTAA

One of the most shameful moments of my life was a fight I had with my ex-wife. We were rolling on the floor by the front door, and it took every ounce of strength for me to throw her out. I remember sitting, back against the wall, the cold feel of the plaster hitting a blanket of sweat; panting like a dry-mouthed dog, listening to her trying to kick the door in from the outside, thinking - something has to change. A few days later, I walked into a bookstore and picked up Allen Carr’s Easyway to Control Alcohol. “What’s that, Dad?” Asked my son. “This is the book that is going to change my life.” If you want to grow the best olives in the world, then find a world-class olive maker. If you want to learn to fly a helicopter, then find someone who can fly a helicopter. If you want to be someone that doesn’t drink alcohol, then find someone that doesn’t drink alcohol. It’s not rocket science (you don’t need to find a rocket scientist). The Truth About Alcohol We Are Not Alcoholics, And we Refuse to be Anonymous Join Us & Our Community TTAA Taster: http://www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/p/TTAA%20Taster TTAA Intensive: https://www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/p/TTAAIntensive Strive Community: https://strive.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/

Power

I spent my entire life trying to ‘fit-in’. Then I became someone that doesn’t drink alcohol. A thread bounces in the breeze of an open door. If I pull it, I run the danger of becoming a bore. If I leave it...man...how can I leave it…I know I’m not going to like what’s in store. When you become someone that doesn’t drink alcohol life can seem a bit of a struggle. You’re no longer the table top wizard; now you’re a muggle. The world is well. Then you stop. You look around, and you’re standing in a bomb crater, and yet, you don’t remember the tick-tick-tock. You check your arms and your legs, and you seem to be all there, but something is missing. Something. Is. Missing. And that’s what we explore in today’s podcast. The Truth About Alcohol We Are Not Alcoholics, And we Refuse to be Anonymous Join Us & Our Community TTAA Taster: http://www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/p/TTAA%20Taster TTAA Intensive: https://www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/p/TTAAIntensive Strive Community: https://strive.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/

Colour Code Personality Science With Striver Claes

I always wanted to Bruce Lee. I wanted to 'Enter the Dragon'. I wanted to be a star. I wanted to be noticed. Had I 'noticed', I would have realised that Bruce Lee was more introvert than extrovert. It would have been a crucial observation because as I ran through the swings karate kicking my friends in the balls, and head butting polystyrene walls, I thought that if you were an introvert, you might as well jump over Niagara Falls. When I was a drinker, had you cut me open with a rusty pocket knife, then the letters E X T R O V E R and T would have fallen into the fruit bowl alongside the pineapples, oranges and lychee. And then I stopped. Drinking. And as time stilled, and the waffles leapt from the toaster, and rich tea biscuits fell apart over my coaster, I began to wonder if the story I had created since the beginning of 'cool as fuck teenage time' was true. Was I an extrovert? I didn’t feel like one. And I think this search for who we are is an important one because it allows us to stick a stiletto in the sand and say. NO MORE! I love this person. And this one. And this one. And this one. And I vow to communicate with them in a way that doesn’t lead to me wanting to deliver the Bruce Lee 'one-inch death punch'. It’s not easy though. Discovering who we are. But at Strive we can help, and that’s what we talk about in today’s podcast when yours truly and Striver Claes speak about our intention of introducing Colour Code Personality Science into our TTAA philosophy. The Truth About Alcohol We Are Not Alcoholics, And we Refuse to be Anonymous Join Us & Our Community TTAA Taster: http://www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/p/TTAA%20Taster TTAA Intensive: https://www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/p/TTAAIntensive Strive Community: https://strive.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/

Stella & Georgie on the Child/Parent Alcohol Dynamic

A Polaroid snap. A desperate need for that feather in the cap. You thought your childhood was beautiful. You felt loved; you had fun; you don’t know what all the fuss is about, but I am telling you that when I was someone that drank alcohol, I was a Brussel sprout. Kids. Such beautiful things. Kurt Douglas dimples in chins, sweet, sweet eyes, the smell of baby breath, and then I come along with the stench of death. Hoisting them onto my shoulders, swerving this way and that like a giraffe trying to become the zoo acrobat. I could have done much more. I could have been much more. And that’s why I want to create this movement of a million people. I want our children to see that it’s cool to be someone that doesn’t drink alcohol, but first, we need to wake the fuck up and take a look at the devastation that we are wreaking in this world. Every time we hold a bottle of wine or a can of lager in our hand we are a walking, talking billboard for the alcohol industry. Our children become us: the imagery; the immorality; the constant psychological battery. And that’s why today’s podcast is so crucial. A child telling her mother how her drinking drove their relationship to a dead-end, and how the transformation to someone that doesn’t drink alcohol means she’s now her best friend. Stella. Georgie. Thanks for your honesty, courage and bravery. Here is today’s podcast. The Truth About Alcohol We Are Not Alcoholics, And we Refuse to be Anonymous Join Us & Our Community TTAA Taster: http://www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/p/TTAA%20Taster TTAA Intensive: https://www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/p/TTAAIntensive Strive Community: https://strive.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/

The Hack

A cigarette machine is an evil thing, and as he stood there before me, shaking nervously, I wanted to hold my finger in the air, hail a cab, find the nearest dive bar, buy one, bring it back, and pound him over the head with it. He called me a ‘hack.’ I had to look it up on the Internet. God Google told me that back in the day it was a term used to describe an ‘ordinary horse.’ In the more modern sense, he was calling me a shit writer. Gut muscles tightened. My father’s voice emerged from the Bermuda Triangle of my mind. “Stick the head in him.” Here was this man, standing before me, telling me that I was nothing more than someone who sits behind a computer ‘banging buttons.’ How do I take that feedback? Do I don a bib and scoop that shit into my mind, making it mine, coating me in a slimy film of lack. Do I give him volley right back? It felt like I was having a heart attack. When we become people that don’t drink alcohol people will stand before us armed with sticks and stones wanting to break our bones. How we react is of prime importance. We have a choice. We always have a choice. Resistance will tell us that they are right and we are wrong, but it’s time for you to grow a pair of balls bigger than King Kong. Feedback is crucial, but we don’t blindly accept it because we crave approval. What do you do in the face of such negativity? Do we accept a state of passivity, or do we start to embrace a higher standard of selectivity? That’s what I talk about in today’s podcast. The Truth About Alcohol We Are Not Alcoholics, And we Refuse to be Anonymous Join Us & Our Community TTAA Taster: http://www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/p/TTAA%20Taster TTAA Intensive: https://www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/p/TTAAIntensive Strive Community: https://strive.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/

When Talking About Alcohol Choose Your Dance Partner Wisely

John is in his 70s. He looks like Al Capone, resplendent with fedora, black and white from head to toe, including those unmistakeable shoes. He’s no gangster. He would look equally at home standing on a rooftop covered in soot. He’s been dancing again. He dances 2-3 times per week. It’s one of the reasons he doesn’t look a year over 60 - that, and he’s someone that doesn’t drink alcohol. I’m trying to change the world, but John has my ear. I take my cans off and give him my undivided attention. It doesn’t matter where John lays down his groove; he’s always the best. I know this because John always tells me this. A tidal wave of confidence flushing the brown smelly stuff from my lugholes. John explains how beautiful it is to find the perfect dance partner, but given his Fred Astaire standing in the world, it’s as rare as a bald eagle dipping into your cat bowl for a spot of Whiskers. Any less than perfect, and there is a mismatch. John has to hold back and dance at the level of the person staring into those ancient eyes. They are hitchhikers; John always has the wheel; dragging those feet, handbrake partially applied. He wants to roll. Roll baby roll. We are always dancing, and it’s crucial when we do that we have the right dance partner. Take the dance between the person starting as someone that doesn’t drink alcohol and the zombie suffering from the deaf effect. It’s demoralising to talk about your new found wisdom when you know the person can’t hear you. Off you go. Invisible. Violent. Dominant. Belief System. You want to roll. Roll baby roll. They can’t keep up, and before you know it, you are both lying on the floor wondering what the fuck went wrong. When talking about alcohol choose your dance partner wisely, and that’s what we talk about in today’s podcast. The Truth About Alcohol We Are Not Alcoholics, And we Refuse to be Anonymous Join Us & Our Community TTAA Taster: http://www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/p/TTAA%20Taster TTAA Intensive: https://www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/p/TTAAIntensive Strive Community: https://strive.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/