The Truth About Alcohol (Why Quitting Feels So Hard)

Episode #133: The Maze

At first, there was me. Angus arrived from Herefordshire. Arthur tuned in from Northern Ireland. Eileen arrived from Australia. Michelle was the first person from America. Then there was Kim. Angus became someone that doesn't drink alcohol and then vanished like a pickle on the table of a deli. King Arthur stayed for 18-months but couldn't crack the code. Kim died. A few weeks ago, Eileen celebrated two years as someone that doesn’t drink alcohol. At the same time, Michelle blew up a few balloons that contained the words “1st Anniversary.” What's the critical ingredient, here? How did Eileen and Michelle move from where they were to where they wanted to be? Firstly, they knew where they wanted to be. Most people get this. Then came the toughest part. They both realised that to find their true essence they had to dispense with their identity. To do this, they needed hope that their essence would be every bit as wonderful as I told them it would be. Hope. At this point, they met Resistance. It wasn't until they both accepted that they LOVED alcohol, and needed every single drop that had ever entered their stomach that they could move on. If we fear our essence, then we cling on to the present. If we are someone who drinks alcohol that means clinging on to the bottle. Faith and hope in your essence and a joyous trepidation of finding it opens you up for the possibility of change. You’re in a maze. Somewhere you will find your essence. Standing in the way of all paths is Resistance. You can’t climb over it. You can’t sneak under it. You can’t squeeze past it. At some point, you have to face it. Join me at 6pm (BST) on Saturday 30 June as I deliver an exclusive webinar on Resistance including what it is, how it manifests and how to beat it. Sign up at www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk today.

Episode #132: The Unlived Life

I wanted to travel the world. I wanted to own a business. I wanted to be a multi-millionaire. I wanted to be a world-class communicator. I wanted to be a public speaker. I wanted to write a book. I wanted to be a teacher. I wanted to donate millions of pounds to charity. I wanted to be the best dad in the world. I wanted to be the best husband in the world. I wanted to experience complete and utter ecstasy. Instead, I woke up every morning, kissed the foreheads of those I loved as they slept, spent 12-hours surrounded by people who hated me in a job that was killing me; came home, stopped in the pub, drank too much, drove home while drunk, made excuses not to spend time with my family, ate take away, drank some more, went to bed, couldn’t sleep because I was so afraid of the next day, and then I would wake up and do it all again. We all live two lives. The one we want. The one we put up with. In between the two, standing like a Clash of Titanesque monolithic statue is Resistance, and until we bring that statue down, nothing changes. Join me at 1 am (BST) on Friday 22 June, and every four hours after that until Monday morning as I deliver an exclusive webinar on Resistance, including what it is, how it manifests, and how to beat it. Sign up at www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk.

Episode #131: Identity & Essence

I got out of bed and fell asleep in the back of the car with a plastic puke bag in my back pocket. It was 4 pm. Duran Duran were on at 7 or 8. The world wouldn’t stay still. Canadian Club something or other. We reached the restaurant. I ordered nothing. I drank water. I puked in the toilet. Red. Yellow. Not much left. I got back in the car and fell asleep on the back seat. “Selfish bastard.” “I don’t no way you bother.” By the time Girls on Film kicked in I was feeling good enough for another beer. The thing with wanting to be someone that doesn’t puke in plastic carrier bags is you focus on the wrong thing. You slap “alcohol” in the bullseye and empty your quiver, but in truth, you’re shooting at the wrong thing. I became someone that doesn’t drink alcohol in 2009. Back then people used to ask me how I had managed it. My response surprised a few people. “I quit my job.” It remains by far the most difficult decision of my life, far more complicated and nuanced than the cessation of alcohol. Here’s the thing. If you want to be someone that doesn’t drink alcohol, you have to aim all of your firepower at your identity. Unload hell. What is life if it isn’t a myriad of internal struggles. These struggles have been ongoing since your teenage years, and what you choose to struggle with (and you do choose) constitutes your identity. If you want to become someone that doesn’t drink alcohol then kill your identity. Can you see why this thing we do is so hard? We can’t kill our identity. If we do that who do we become? We will look into the mirror and see nothing. But this is what we have to do. Status. Stuff. Identity. Love. Once you stop holding onto these attachments, you are left with your true essence. When you find your true essence, there is no desire to drink alcohol, because it no longer provides you with value. I tell people that I lost everything, but maybe I need to change that battlecry to the more apt I gained everything. I gained a new love. I gained new relationships. I gained meaning and purpose. I gained insight. I gained confidence. I gained truth. When you say, “I don’t know who I am anymore,” you’ve nailed it. And what stops us finding our true essence. Resistance. Join me at 1 am (BST) on Friday 22 June, and every four hours thereafter until Monday morning as I deliver a special webinar on Resistance, including what it is, how it manifests, and how to beat it. https://www.thetruthaboutalcohol.co.uk/

Episode #130: Emily Ann Peterson on Bare Naked Bravery

In 2013, Emily Ann Peterson was diagnosed with a degenerative neurological hand tremor, which forever altered her two-decade livelihood as a cellist/cello teacher. Refusing to lose her life's love of expression, she knew she’d have to be brave. In an act of neurological defiance, she expanded into wider mediums and broke through her creative glass ceiling, opening the door to limitless possibilities through songwriting. Her book Bare Naked Bravery: How to Be Creatively Courageous helps people from all walks of life understand what bravery really is - allowing them to step into it by creatively using vulnerability, imagination and improvisation. Her podcast, Bare Naked Bravery, features conversations with everyday heroes and creative entrepreneurs about the quiet successes and loud failures required to do the brave things for which we know and love them. Emily Ann's community of fans, listeners, and readers offers a welcoming, safe place for creative misfits to finally find belonging and acceptance. Emily writes for people who struggle to remember what hope feels like and sings to those who yearn for something secret. She speaks to those who are done being bored and crave all things beautiful, strong, sacred, and sensual. Her goal is to inspire a global resonance and magnanimous community through the marriage of art and whole-person development. Learn more about Emily and hear her music at www.emilyannpeterson.com.

Episode #129: Ricky Siegel on Lust, Love and Libido

RICHARD M. SIEGEL, PhD, LMHC, CST, is the Director of Modern Sex Therapy Institutes, a postgraduate continuing education institute which trains sex therapists and sexual medicine specialists at multiple sites throughout the country. Dr. Siegel is a Florida-licensed mental health counselor and Board-certified sex therapist, and is certified by the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT) as a sex therapist and supervisor. He has a rich experiential background, including over 20 years working in sexuality education and addiction treatment, teaching on college campuses, and maintaining a private sex therapy practice. He enjoys a reputation as a seasoned and in-demand workshop and conference presenter, in addition to his work in training and supervising sex therapists. Dr. Siegel completed his Doctoral dissertation at the American Academy of Clinical Sexologists in Orlando, FL, with research on Sexuality Issues in Addiction, Treatment & Recovery. He has worked enthusiastically to integrate traditional sex therapy into the emergent specialty of sexual medicine, as well as the addiction treatment field.

Ep 128: Tiffany Han on the Motherfucking Truth

Hand raiser and yes sayer, Tiffany Han is a creative coach and strategist for highly-creative women and host of the Raise Your Hand Say Yes, a podcast about the creative adventures of extraordinary people. The love child of Terry Gross and Don Draper, she crafts programs and resources that help female entrepreneurs define their work, speak their truths, and take bold, inspired action toward being more successful in their creative business and also having as much fun as possible. Tiffany quit drinking on January 4, 2017 and shares her journey on her podcast and in her writing as a way to illustrate the power of letting go of the things that no longer serve you. In her spare time (ha!), she starts as many dance parties as she can with her husband and twin daughters. You can find out more at tiffanyhan.com and go behind the scenes on Instagram @thetiffanyhan.

Episode #127: Lynda West on the Year of Fear

Known as the Oprah of San Diego, Lynda West is a master connector, best selling author, editor-in-chief and contributor of Life By Design Magazine, and the Facebook Live queen having done 2,400+ Facebook live videos. In 2015 she embarked on a journey of facing at least 1 fear every day. During her journey she met people ranging from Frank Shankwitz (the creator and a founder of the Make-a-Wish Foundation), Ron Klein (the inventor of the magnetic strip on the back of credit and debit cards), Brian Smith (the founder of UGG Boots), Gene Landrum (the creator of everyone's favorite mouse, Chuck E. Cheese), and many more. In addition, she has been on the red carpet interviewing stars at the Academy Awards After Party, The City Gala. She started Living Live to help women entrepreneurs break through their fears so they can gain more confidence, generate more revenue, and make a greater impact on the world. Lynda can be found on Facebook at www.fb.com/livinglive55

Episode #126: Greg Reid - Are You Ready to Bleed

As a Keynote Speaker, Master Storyteller, Bestselling Author, Movie Producer and Writer, Greg Reid is someone who will make you see what’s possible. Experiencing Greg on stage is like a rollercoaster you’ll never forget, with twists, turns and surprises that will ignite your senses leaving you on your feet screaming for more. He has graced the stages from the Pentagon to the United Nations on topics such as perseverance, success, adaptability, and turning ideas into reality. A producer and writer, Greg is known for Three Feet From Gold, Pass it On, and WishMan. Take a ride with Greg and experience, as he does, the wonders of the world and connections life brings. Change your life and the lives of others, determine what you need for success, and become a champion.

Episode #125: Georgia Foster on How to Drink Less in 7 Days

Georgia Foster is a Clinical Hypnotherapist & Voice Dialogue Trainer Georgia qualified with distinction at The London College of Clinical Hypnosis in 1994. She also is trained in Voice Dialogue with the founders Hal & Sidra Stone. Georgia then went on to become one of the college’s senior lecturers before venturing out on her own to build her on-line products while running her busy London Clinic. Georgia now resides in Melbourne, Australia with her partner Ian and triplet boys Ollie, Finn and Hugh. Georgia has been featured regularly in the media in Britain and Australia including Sky News, GMTV, Psychologies Magazine, Good Housekeeping, just to name a few. Georgia specialises in alcohol reduction, emotional over-eating, self-esteem, anxiety and fertility issues. Her unique and highly successful approach has helped tens of thousands of people learn how to feel better emotionally and physically. Books that Georgia has published: • The Weight Less Mind • The Drink Less Mind • Drink Less in 7 Days • The 4 Secrets of Amazing Sex • The Stress Less Mind • The Fertile Mind Her on-line programs are: 7 Days To Drink Less, Believing In You, The 3 Minute Anxiety Fix, The Weight Less Mind and more. Georgia’s contact details are: Georgia@georgiafoster.com www.georgiafoster.com

Episode #124: Alicia Cook on The Other Side of Addiction

Alicia Cook is an established writer and award-winning activist from New Jersey. She has been featured in the NY Post, CNN, Asbury Park Press, Teen Vogue, Bustle, American Songwriter Magazine, and the LA Times. Cook contributes regularly to the HuffPost, USA Today, and Thrive. Her best-selling book of poetry, “Stuff I’ve Been Feeling Lately“, was a finalist in the 2016 Goodreads Choice Awards. Cook announced her next book of poetry, “I Hope My Voice Doesn’t Skip,” will be released through Andrews McMeel Publishing in June of 2018. The recipient of the Special Voices Award (NJTV, Trenton), her essay series exploring the direct impact addiction has on not only the user, but the family, “The Other Side of Addiction”, has gained a worldwide readership. The Other Side of Addiction shares stories of people who have experienced this disease. After losing her cousin, Jessica, to a heroin overdose, Cook began using her words to help other families going through similar situations feel less alone. These are very personal accounts, written to shed light on this deadly epidemic and prove that anyone can be affected. Some pieces of the series have gone on to be viewed over 1 million times, with the average essay being viewed at least 10,000 times. Her efforts to combat the heroin epidemic, which include writing, appearing on podcasts, and speaking to students and their parents, caught the attention of PBS Executive Producer, Steve Rogers, who created an episode of his Emmy-nominated documentary series, “Here’s the Story” around Cook and her efforts entitled “A Family Disease.” The episode was dedicated to Cook’s cousin, Jessica. It has gone on to be officially selected in numerous film festivals across New Jersey.